The Art of Being Busy

People have often told me that I am busy. 
In a phone conversation last week, a friend said that when he reads the blog he gets the sense that my life is busy. When I called to rearrange some prenatal classes, the receptionist looked through my account and said, "Man, you are one busy gal." And, my mother sometimes doesn't call because she says she knows I'm busy and she doesn't want to bother me. Obviously, it's a recurring conversation in my life.
My schedule has been busier. Really. I don't even consider this phase of my life to be actually very busy--at all. Which makes be believe that I must have, in a previous life (I refer to them as Liz 1.0, Liz 2.0, etc.), mastered the Art of Looking Busy and the Art of Acting Busy. Ever since the release date of Liz 3.0, I haven't been able to transform that conversation. I feel like I am stuck with it sometimes--like it's everyone's listening of me and I can't quite figure out how to get it to evolve. 


There is a distinct difference from the Art of Looking Busy or the Art of Acting Busy and the Art of Being Busy. 
Let me explain.
The Art of Looking Busy or the Art of Acting Busy is strategic and purposeful. It is used to ward off other things that one doesn't want to deal with--a phone call, a conversation, a job, a task, etc. An earlier version of me used to use this tactic ALL. THE. TIME. so that she didn't have to deal with anyone else's anything. She could live in her own world. She might have appeared something like this: 

The Art of Looking Busy

The Art of Being Busy is very different. The Art of Being Busy involves being busy about the best things in life. The things that light me up. The things that I am passionate about. The things that I care about. The things that I love. The things that I find interesting and enjoyable. AS. MANY. AS. POSSIBLE.

I mean, if I am only going to live on this planet for a handful of decades, then I would like to be up to something. I'd like to be learning, making a difference, laughing, meeting fabulous people, challenging myself, spending time with loved ones and enjoying ALL life offers. The Art of Being Busy is carefully selecting what I am to be busy about and making it all work. Like this: 

Art of Being Busy

The only thing that stands between me and perfecting  Art of Being Busy is circumstance. And what I know about circumstance is that--not matter what the circumstance is--it can be rearranged to make everything work out how I intend. I have the power to create my life so that it works for me and works with me; that's the life that has me stand in a powerful place on the planet. That's the life I choose.

Please know that if you feel like I am too busy to be bothered or too busy to fit you in to my schedule, that's false. Just give me a call, drop me a message, make me an offer. We can work it out. We can always make it work. Liz 3.5 is in its beta form, but she's working on having the  Art of Being Busy look and feel a little like the Art of Being Zen.

 

Art of Being Zen

Coming to Terms

This week, we had our first (of three) childbirth classes. And my reaction was not what I expected. 
I have been alright with the concept and reality of being pregnant.
I got used to the movement of a live child in my uterus.


However, during the viewing of a live birth, every single muscle in my body reacted to what I saw. If they could have joined in unison, they would have shouted:
WE ARE NOT DOING THAT!
No way. No how. Not going to happen, lady.
Forget about it. 


The problem is that this train has already left the station. The ship has sailed. There's no turning back time. If only I could find a way...


For now, I get to deal with my reaction. In seven days, I get to return to the classroom to see more women shouting and grunting. I get to visualize that that woman is me.


Don't come too soon, baby. I (apparently) have not come to terms. Yet.

My paper baby

My paper, baby.

Dear real, live, kicking kiddo, I hate to break it to you, but you aren't the only thing developing around here. Considering I haven't posted for 26 days, readers should be getting suspicious about what's up with us.
Well, I did indeed have my final meeting for the dissertation. Some universities call this a "defense," but at Hamline there's no need to defend. The philosophy is that you really have already defended your choices at the proposal meeting and the committee accepted those decisions at that time. They have also seen and read your work as it's developing so there's no surprise to them about what's happening in your research. They don't need you to defend it, they want you to talk about it. They are genuinely interested in what you found.
That's the reason each of them is on the committee--they can benefit from knowing what you know and discovered through your research. The afternoon meeting was held in the "kitchen" at the MAT office. (Literally. The MAT faculty hold office in a house across the street from campus.) Dan made apple pecan crumble that got RAVE reviews. (Each meeting we have had has been accompanied by a baked good from our house. I think it's helped to sway the committee members.) ;-) Anyway, I wasn't nervous at all about this meeting; it's impossible not to know what it is I was going to talk about given how closely I worked with the participants in my study, the data and the results. It was a lively discussion that resulted in more questions than answers.
Questions > Answers = Success @ Final Dissertation Meeting
However, what comes out of the meeting are recommendations to improve the paper:

The result of my final dissertation meeting: a few edits. Just a few. ;-)

 It ain't over yet, baby. 
For an entire week I worked to get the edits made before I started working on the formatting of this monster. Then, on April 19, I sent it to my advisor. At that point, I started work on my works cited pages (there were over 20...let's say I had a little sympathy for my students who were working on perfecting their three citations for a class assignment).
I learned a valuable lesson: when I really don't want to do something, I really don't want to do it. 
This is why I put off working on the works cited for a year. A year.
And: Someone should pay attention to the tinylittledetails.
This is also why it was such a struggle for me to enjoy college catering gigs. Every napkin has a place. Every plate has a place. Every fork, knife, spoon is precisely located in relation to the other items on the table. The chairs. Oh, god. The chairs. Sometimes they were measured. Seriously.

What my works cited should look like.

It's probably because of this that I appreciate the beauty of perfection, cleanliness and attention. I value it. I notice it.
However, that doesn't make me any more ecstatic about having to do it myself. However, if all that holds me back from finishing this dissertation and graduating are commas and periods, I'll iron my white shirt, crease my black pants and get to work.

Appropriate uniform for dissertation revision.

Here's to Hoping

Blogging fail.
I say, sometimes, when creating and publishing books is a part of my job, I don't always have the creative energy to post to a blog. I say, that's what happened in March, my friends.
Yearbookland gets a little hectic when final deadlines roll through. I start spending my prep hour locked away in the back of my classroom. I squirrel away at my computer during lunch time. It's a pretty isolating way to live. But, that's the way the work gets done.
Dissertationtown has also picked up speed. My final meeting is scheduled on April 10, so that means I have been tethered to my computer for a few weeks now. I even brought my laptop on Spring Break and on a trip with friends up North. I keep holding out hope that some day soon I'll feel the release of the weight of the Big D (and, no, I don't mean Dallas or Divorce). Realizing that I have a drafted document that is 241 pages is shocking--to say the least. Knowing that all I have to work on this week is the works cited pages is at least somewhat comforting.

Actual Representation of a Literature Review

I am anticipating the light feeling of freedom and relaxation to be quickly followed by the realization that I'm carrying weight somewhere else...

A couple of major difference will be that a.) I won't be in a tropical location on vacation. b.) I won't shelving beer on my belly. c.) I doubt I'll be seen anywhere in public wearing my swim suit.

Most likely, I'll look a little more like this: 

Here's to hoping that a black graduation gown can take 20-30 pounds off my figure...or that people are at least distracted by all of the other regalia I'm sporting in May. 

Here's to hoping I'll be a more regular blogger then, too.